Third Eye

“Third Eye” © Louie Rochon Photography

“I want a life that sizzles and pops and makes me laugh out loud. And I don’t want to get to the end, or to tomorrow, even, and realise that my life is a collection of meetings and pop cans and errands and receipts and dirty dishes. I want to eat cold tangerines and sing out loud in the car with the windows open and wear pink shoes and stay up all night laughing and paint my walls the exact color of the sky right now. I want to sleep hard on clean white sheets and throw parties and eat ripe tomatoes and read books so good they make me jump up and down, and I want my everyday to make God belly laugh, glad that he gave life to someone who loves the gift.”

Shauna Niequist

“I invented my life by taking for granted that everything I did not like would have an opposite, which I would like.”

Coco Chanel

“Sorrow prepares you for joy. It violently sweeps everything out of your house, so that new joy can find space to enter. It shakes the yellow leaves from the bough of your heart, so that fresh green leaves can grow in their place. It pulls up the rotten roots, so that new roots hidden beneath have room to grow. Whatever sorrow shakes from your heart, far better things will take their place.”

Rumi

“The most wasted of all days is one without laughter.”

Nicolas Chamfort

JOY OF LIVING

Isn’t it selfish to focus only on my own joy and happiness?

I am often asked this, and told that what I teach must encourage selfishness. Not a bit of it.

Here’s an analogy – you’re on a plane waiting for take off and a crew member advises you what to do in an emergency. Oxygen masks will drop from above and those with children must place one over their own mouth first, then take care of their child. If you don’t, and in the chaos lose consciousness, what possible use could you be to the one dependent on you?

If we take care of ourselves first, and establish our own happiness then we are much nicer people to be around. We’re kinder and gentler to others, we have more of ourselves and our time to share and we inspire those around us to be joyful. Isn’t that how you would like to be for others?

Think of a day when you’ve been really stressed, anxious, and feeling like the present situation is just too much to bear. How have you reacted to those around you?

Now think of a day when everything went well for you, the sun shone on everything you were doing and all your plans worked out. How did  you respond to family, friends and colleagues? And didn’t they all feel good in your company too?

So taking care of ourselves first is a gift we give not just to ourselves but to all those we care about. And we shine that light on everyone we encounter. What better way to live your life?

Is this life coaching?

There are similarities. Life coaching has become hugely popular and can be very useful for identifying your goals and steering a course through life to achieve them. But what I teach, and have spent many years learning, goes deeper.

It’s about learning what you do and why you do it, and how things keep playing out in your life the way they do. With greater understanding of ourselves and what has shaped us, change and growth can happen more easily.

I am also more of a mentor than a coach as I’ve been around quite some time now. So I can bring experience and perspective to whatever situation needs to be understood.

Is this touchy freely spiritual stuff?

Yes we work on the spiritual aspect of who you are, but not in any religious or evangelical way. We help to identify what makes you truly you, and how you connect to the inner being beyond your mind. It’s practical application, and I’m not here to influence your spiritual beliefs in any way.

The definition that reflects how I feel about it is “Spirituality is a connection to every living force in nature and the Universe. This connection provides unlimited resources and a sense of being complete.”

If I take the eight part course how much work will I have to do?

As one of my clients said at the end of week two “I’ve realised now that I can’t just fit this work into ten minutes before bed, because if I do I’m not taking in all you’re showing me.”

The more time you can spend on the exercises and reflecting on what they are helping you to understand the better. But day to day life, families and work can be very demanding so I understand that this isn’t easy. Two to three hours a week is the base line, spread through the week.

If you know you may struggle to keep up once a week you can take a fortnight between each meeting on Skype and spread the work a little more. But be mindful that there is a temptation to think  – I’ve got two weeks, I don’t need to look at it yet, and it ends up being squeezed into the last few days. So think about what would work best for you.

JOY OF WRITING

What kind of writing do you work on?

Primarily I teach the craft of good writing, for whatever purpose, and help people to engage with their own individual creativity. From that flows whatever they want to work on.

This may be story telling, a novel, or poetry. Or it could be documentary, journalism, copy writing, press releases, business communications and marketing. Wherever the written word is needed it can often be improved by some good ground work and individual flair.

I want to write a book, can you help me?

If you have an idea, the outline and the ambition and need some guidance with the structure and the flow, I can certainly help.

If your book is already pretty much written and you want advice I’m sorry I don’t read full manuscripts. I’m happy to see a chapter or two, up to 2,000 words, and give you all the help I can. This can be explored further in a free 30 minute conversation.

If I take the eight part course how much work will I have to do?

As much as you can, and a base of three to four hours a week, preferably more. Spreading the course to every two weeks instead of one may work better for you if you have a busy life. But it is important not to leave it to one side because it feels like you have loads of time and then find you have to hurry to fit it in.

Success is in the practicing, and receiving feedback and encouragement. The more of your work we can cover the better.